For just a moment

Today we had our DNC or whatever it's called. We chose this option based on information we were given regarding the miscarriage and some of the things that were discovered in the ultrasound. They wanted to test the tissues and with that, I'll spare you the details.

Calls, facebook messages, texts and even some flowers from Candi are all coming in and making this a little easier. Thanks to those who have taken the time to send little message of prayers and love. We fell blessed to have you all in our lives.

We are both still raw. It's only been 10 weeks but we had plans and dreams all the more for this little angel. We have both cried and I'm grateful to be married to a man who can show me his hurt and let me comfort him too. We hope to do some sort of memoriam for this loss. We are unsure yet of what that will be.

Our families helped out today. Getting the kids to school and Joe's mom even picked them up as well as retrieving 2 more grandchildren for a total of 4 at the end of the day. She has them over the weekend and graciously offered to keep ours over night as well. We decided though that even though I'm feeling pretty bad from the surgery still, we needed to see those little faces. I was worried at first but I thought I would share with you the conversation we had with Jack on the ride home from Grandma's.

Jack: I missed you today DaddyMomma (said as one word)

Me: Me too baby, Do you remember where we went today?

Jack: Yep, To the doctor to fix the baby.

Me: Yes, to the doctor Jack, but not to fix the baby. Remember the baby is in Heaven?

Jack: Yes, because, because the baby is with Jesus.

Me: Yes buddy. You are right. The baby is an Angel in heaven.

Jack: Yep his name is Angel Baby, and she's special.

Me & Joe:(both in tears now) Yes Jack, Angel Baby is watching over and protecting us.

For just a moment today, my little 3 year old son took the feelings in my heart that I have only spoke to Joe and stated them plainly and perfectly. Thank you Jack, for all of this. You, your Brother Luke, and Angel Baby are loved so much by us.

***If you have sent us a message and we have not responded directly, I'm sorry. We don't know what to say just yet. This is much easier to "vent" about all of the feelings.