Priorities

So, I have had a VERY interesting 24 hours. Before I get into it I must say that now... only now, can I find the humor in the fact that my last 2 posts refer to "father time slowing down" and "my heaven is".

Let's take us back: 5 am yesterday morning I'm up and getting ready for work and have a sharp pain in my chest near the beginning of my cleavage (which is funny also because I'm Italian and chesty, to put it mildly). I go about my day and here and there and notice that a few times an hour I have pain in my chest. I casually mention it to Joe and keep going. I get home and get myself in order kissing the kiddo's and getting dinner ready. I was also in process of going through the kids clothing to give back to my SIL which is a project in itself and takes around 2-4 hours every time I do it.

We sit for dinner and Jack climbs into my lap and the pain comes again and harder. Over and Over...It feels like Jack's sitting on my chest not on my lap. I can't lift him and I'm feeling nauseated and cold and tingly. I try to lay down and it's not getting better. I call the nurse line and she tells me to call 911. I dismiss her and get ahold of my sister to come for the kids and we take off for the nearest ER which is in WB, a neighboring city. We are 10 min max from there. About 4 min into the drive I begin to feel even worse and start to wonder if the little thought that had been creeping into my head is true.

I'm 29 yrs old.... Can I really be having a heart attack? Am I going to die because I was too stupid and cheap to call an ambulance??? I should know better; I'm a lifeguard for goodness sake!!

Then I look at Joe and tell him that maybe we should have called the ambulance. I then pray.

Lord please... please, let me be ok. I need to watch my boys grow. Please let me be ok. I need to grow old with Joe. Amen

Joe and I arrive at the ER and wouldn't you know that an ambulance beat us there as well as a man who was elderly is sitting in a wheel chair bleeding.... not a ton, but still. I get my vitals and at this point my heart is pounding and I'm just well frankly FREAKING OUT in my head. My father is there and I can tell he's trying not to cry. I keep telling myself, Just keep talking, Just stay awake, Just don't pass out..

We get in and get admitted. They hook me up to all these monitors and do an EKG as well as a chest x-ray. They are now thinking that I'm too young and healthy to have a heart attack. (Whew, if they only knew of my love for oreo's and fast food) They wonder if it's not a blood clot in the lungs.... What would that mean?

After multiple tests, pokes and prods.... Can you guess what they told me? They think I strained a muscle in my chest. WHAT? I mean don't get me wrong... I'm glad it's not at all worse but how does a muscle strain create the tingle in the arms, the nausea and chills.... I didn't make this up.

What's my point.... the 8 minutes on the ride to the hospital I was thinking were my last 8 minutes... .I can tell you right now that the only thing on my heaven list that matters at all is Joe and the boys. Don't get me wrong, I love my friends and family but when it all comes down to it... I can't imagine life without them. So, I'm grateful for my life, more today that I have been in a long time. I'm lucky and so very blessed. Father time.... slow down but don't Stop!!! Heaven is now my family growing old and being healthy.