"Don't worry, be happy"

17 years ago this month.............
I had met Joe for the first time and we were "going out".

8 years ago this month...........
Joe and had our first date (for the second time because we "dated" 9 yrs before)

4 years ago today......................
We had begun to "talk" more about having kids and our plan for the future.

3 years ago today.....................
I was doing every single possible thing I could to go into labor and have the precious little wonder in my womb. I had imagined his face, wondered many many times if I would be a good mom and would he look like Joe or me or be like Joe or me.

2 years ago today..........
I was a mess feeling so very mixed about my baby turning one and being excited at the fact that he would be walking soon.

1 year ago today...............
I was full of emotion. My mom was undergoing chemotherapy, I was pregnant with Luke and worried about if I would have to have another c-section, I was excited to also see what Luke would be like, curious as to what kind of a brother Jack would make, worried that I had gotten pregnant too soon and would be short changing Jack on more time with Joe and I. Would my mom be ok, would the stress of her being sick effect Luke....

Today I am.....................
Excited that my baby is going to be 3 and sad that he is. Proud of the amazing person and brother he is, and curious to see all that he will become. I am still worried about an array of things from the daily workings of teaching him to be patient, to the yearly things like seasonal flu and preschool in our future. But for just today, tomorrow at his party, and Sunday on his actual birthday, I am excited and happy.

Happy that I met Joe 17 yrs ago.

Happy that he was my first love.

Happy that destiny brought us back together 8 yrs ago.

Happy that we decided to have a family.

Happy that our little family is healthy.

Happy that Joe chose me and that through our love we have these beautiful blessings.

For all the worry in those years, I have had a partner to stand next to me and there has been double the happy and most of the worry was just me being me. I know I will always worry, but I'm glad that as I get older I'm gaining perspective on the waste of the worry.